Body Modification

If you’re a geek it’s already very important for you to be able to distinguish yourself from the herd. And if your Babylon 5 t-shirt and anime cat ear hat isn’t doing the trick, what can you do? It’s time to alter your actual body.

You’ll want to start off slow and easy, with your hair. For male geeks, long hair is essential, either worn in a ponytail or as a ragged, oily mess cascading down freely. You’ll want a goatee, vandyke, or some other facial hair as well. For female geeks the sky’s the limit. Grab a razor and some hair dye and just go nuts!

Soon, though, you’ll want to stand out even more, and take it to the next level. That’s when you get the piercings. Start with the ear, of course, but make sure you’ve got something pretty massive pushed through it; anyone can have just an earring! Next you’ll want to do the lip and the eyebrow. You may want to skip the nose for the moment, as that’s becoming a little too mainstream. A stud through the tongue is good for implying you’re a sexual powerhouse.

As for whether or not to pierce a nipple or two, that’s your call. Honestly, by merely saying you have a pierced nipple you can achieve the same results as you can by going through the trouble of actually getting it pierced, especially for women.

Eventually you’ll be ready for the next level: the geek tattoo.

As has been pointed out, for a geek it is insufficient to show your devotion to your geek idol by merely enjoying it, you have to have the action figures, the screensaver, and the t-shirt. But think: are you really honoring Farscape enough? A tattoo is like a t-shirt you never have to take off! Another t-shirt you never take off, that is.

This will never get old!

This will never get old!

Don’t be dissuaded by the permanent nature of a tattoo. That Boba Fett helmet on your bicep will always be a great idea. Several years from now your tattoo might help you meet other Highlander fans in the nursing home. And by the time you might look at the HTML code on your arm and wonder what the hell it meant your eyes will probably be clouded over with cataracts anyway. (I am being sarcastic here, of course. Geeks have no sense of anything ever being past its time anyway.)

While kanji and Atari Logos might be a little too mainstream now there are still plenty of geek icons you can add to your body forever. Geeks have shown us that there’s no 8-bit videogame mascot too obscure to revel in, Lego bricks delight the young and old, and superhero logos are a perennial favorite. For best results, have a tattoo that will make others have to ask what it is, since they don’t recognize Elvish or Aurebesh at first glance.

It makes them unique, albeit in the same predictable ways, so geeks LOVE body modification!


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